Buck Spender of Sweat, Florida, always considered himself in the ‘spirit of the pioneers’: “I love sunsets, Westerns, fishing, that stuff,” Spender said, “But I always dreamed of going West, like the pioneers. Maybe up to the new territory of Alaska. So that’s when I bought this RV. Just like the pioneers.”

The recreational vehicle that Spender bought was on 80-foot 2025 Boeing Road Whale, despite the fact that he had never driven anything bigger than a Honda Civic before. “It was the biggest,” he said proudly. “I’m a little surprised they let me drive it off the lot. But I only crushed two sedans. Florida has a three-sedan law.”

The 2025 model has satellite TV, Starlink, four push-outs, three push-ins, leather couches, a walk-in bathtub with spa jets, full kitchen, wine cellar and integrated AI assistant named Hal 9000. “It’s basically a Conestoga wagon.” 

Soon Spender was on his way: “From Florida, across the Appalachians and the Midwest. Almost got rolled over by the wind in Kansas. But the Whale prevailed, like any good horse.”

“There were other RVs on the road of course, but my Whale was the biggest by at least twenty feet. We rolled inexorably westward, like on the Oregon Trail, crossing the Mississippi, following the sunset. Gas stations scattered across the prairie like buffalo. Buffalo chicken, mmm. Wildfire smoke in the southwest like the smoke from one-horse towns with names like Tombstone and Shotgun. Phoenix. I think my RV was the biggest building in Tombstone.

“I drove her over the Rockies, up Highway 1 and into British Columbia. He patted the side of the Whale. “Now we’re in the Last Frontier and I feel like I’m the first to see this untouched wilderness and experience it like our forefathers did.”

The Whale’s many appliances whirred in agreement and a monotone voice spoke from a glowing red console. “Howdy, Sheriff. You are completely correct. Let’s git on down to the watering hole.”

Mr. Spender looked a bit embarrassed, “I asked Hal to call me sheriff.”