Local father of three, Michael Michalski, accompanied his children trick-or-treating this year while wearing a costume he described as “Myself.”
“Uh, this is a T-shirt. American-something. Eagle? Can’t read it anymore. Colombia jacket. Got it on sale at, you know, wherever. It used to be waterproof-ish. Good blue jeans,” he said.
Along with Michalski were daughters Emily, 8, dressed as Elsa from Frozen, and Sophie, 6, also Elsa from Frozen, and son Billy, 5, who was a dinosaur. The family had been walking around the neighborhood for about an hour at the time of interview and were experiencing highly elevated sucrose levels.
“I’m sure Billy is far above .08 blood-Hershey content,” said Michalski, “Thegirls are harder to gauge. I’m just hoping we can make the rounds and get home before the great crash.”
“Yeah, Dad didn’t really try this Halloween,” said Emily. “Last year he was Frankenstein, which was cool, but Sophie got scared.”
“I was not scared,” said Sophie. “And I’m Elsa, not Sophie.”
“No, I’m Elsa, and you’re copying me. Dad, she’s copying me!”
“Rawr,” Billy said and chomped on the frills of Sophie’s dress, who shrieked, “Daaaad!”
“Billy, stop biting your sister. Sophie, quiet down, I’m trying to talk.” Michalski said. “Normally I’d have my Cubs ball cap on but it’s chilly, so I’m wearing this knit cap. Gift from Melissa, uh, five Christmases ago?”
“Four,” said Emily.
“Rawr,” said Billy.
“Right, thanks. Originally I was going to do Austin Powers because that’s my favorite movie, but, you know, explaining that to kids… then I was going to do ‘zombie lite’, like no gore, but then it took forever to get Billy into his dinosaur, and then it got late, meh,” Michalski shrugged.
“RAWR!” Billy screamed and everyone said, “Billy!”
“—Anyway, I just decided to go as myself.”