The Chilkat Valley News announced last week that it was in talks to acquire New York-based media conglomerate 21st Century Fox.
“We’re very excited at the prospect of this merger and what it means for the news and entertainment industry in the Upper Lynn Canal,” a spokesperson for the Chilkat Valley News said. “The CVN is dedicated to bringing the best news to Southeast Alaska with the most entertaining police blotter in the world.”
21st Century Fox issued a press release saying that the corporation was pleased with the acquisition and the potential benefits for shareholders. “We look forward to being under the direction of this venerable and profitable company.”
The deal, worth 17 gazillion dollars, would position the Chilkat Valley News to take a major share of market dominance. Critics of the merger say that it will effectively eliminate competition and make it impossible for other news organizations to operate in the area. Kristin Kristmire, editor of the Juneau Empire, said, “The CVN is already a powerful news organization and this buy-out will make it a juggernaut. We’re a relatively small newsroom. The Fed should step in and block this before it becomes a monopoly.”
Chris Christerson, who runs the news department at the only radio station in the Upper Lynn Canal said, “What? A gazillion dollars? Is that more than a million? We’ve got one part-time reporter! Why would they do this to us?”
Federal regulators have flagged the acquisition as a possible violation of antitrust laws. Kyle Smithers, with the Federal Trade Commission, said that they did not plan to bring any lawsuits but that “there are several aspects of the transaction that are being investigated for anti-competitive activity.”
The famously reclusive founder and CEO of the Chilkat Valley News, Vladimir Vladimova, has not issued a statement about the acquisition. Mr. Vladimova, who is involved in extensive legal battles over the inheritance of his vast media empire, has made headlines recently for his connections to several Russian billionaires. However, in an interview on the podcast Business Wars, he said about the impending merger: “Everything that has transpired has done so according to my design.”