Wanna know the funny thing about piracy? Me. I am the funny thing about privacy. No—wait’ll I tell you this. You won’t believe it, but will also know it’s true. Seriously the worst combo. Like a riddle made out of reality by a total pirate, n’est pas?
Don’t worry, I am totally safe, folks—this is why I spent two years becoming your Alaskan folklorist. So you know I’m on team Haines.
That way telling you…
